6 Month Update

Back in January I wrote about going on a quest  to re-find myself. Here is a clip:

I want to blog. I want to exercise. I want to be a thoughtful friend. I want to be a lot of the things I used to be.

And so, this year I plan to find those things. I may not (read: will not) have a craft room that I get to play in every day. I may not have the amazing gym membership I did 5 years ago, or get the amazing workouts 6 days a week I was fortunate to have. I may not be able to be everything I wish I could be, but at least I can find where this new me fits amidst the shuffle and work. I'm on a quest to find me, and in the meantime I hope  to bring this little blog along for the ride! Should be fun!

So, 6 months in I decided I should take a look at how I've done.

First up: I want to blog.
Well, clearly that one hasn't gone well. I did manage to get a handful of posts in for a few months, but May went by without even a thought - and June had just barely more than that. I wish that weren't the case. I have trouble sometimes thinking of what to write, but mostly I just don't devote my time at the computer to that. It's still - always - a yearning I have. And I refuse to give up. But, on my quest, this piece has yet to be found.

Next: I want to exercise.
I'm happy to note that despite many bumps and bruises, I have been able to work on this one. I worked out most of January until a neck injury/issue came up and I could hardly stand to even move. I found out I have cervical stenosis (I can't decide if that does or does not deserve a post in itself) and it had me pretty immobile for a few weeks. But, thanks to amazing physical therapy, I was back to working out in March. I worked out the entire month of March - like, at least 5 days per week. I felt really good. April came and the final push of tax season took priority over all else. Seems to be that way every year huh? Its like - despite any amount of planning, I just have to write off the month of April or something. I slowly picked it back up after April 15 and through the end of May I was back to regular exercise. June didn't go great between Austin being gone, weekend trips every weekend, and other things. But I've been back at it this month, yet again. The point here is - I may not be able to consistently workout 6 days/week for months and months on end. But, I am still working at it. I am still doing my best and when I workout I feel better about everything. It really is the best drug. I still think about my trainer in Colorado, my bikini I wore on our family trip, and the awesome muscles I had in my back. I think about them often. Maybe one day I'll be back there, and maybe I won't. But I know I'm better for the effort and I am glad I am sticking with this despite the distractions.

Third: I want to be a thoughtful friend.
This is a hard area for me. I love serving other people. I love serving friends. I love sending notes in the mail, doing things out of the blue or being as helpful as I can to my friends. Problem: I don't have many local friends. It's been a challenge to try to make connections with 3 kids and all else, but I do think I've been able to be thoughtful to my long distance friends. Or I've made efforts - I guess I can't speak for the delivery of that :) I am definitely more conscious of it, and I enjoy when I make efforts towards this goal. I'm sure it's more of a journey than a destination.

And perhaps the most fun for me is that I found a (very dorky, almost not-admittable) hobby. I don't have extended periods of time to devote to hobbies. In the past, I enjoyed making quilts, working on scrapbooks, reading books...but I don't have long stretches of time and some of those projects are hard to pick up and put down. However, I did discover bullet journaling, May Designs notebooks (I believe I already professed my love here), lettering samples on pinterest, Foxy Fix traveler's notebooks, and a love for light journaling. Wow. I can't believe I gave that many details. As I would expect, I don't have the most beautiful or detailed journals (like the groups I stalk on facebook) but not only is a fun little outlet for creativity and to be in my own world for a minute, it helps keep me organized and on top of things. It also can be done for 5 minutes at a time with no issue, which is the perfect hobby for me.

I'm glad I sat down to write this post. When I was browsing my previous posts I saw the title "on a quest for me" and my heart sank, thinking I had wasted the last 6 months and not even started on my quest. But, I realize I have! That's huge for this season where I feel like I just stand still all the time. Work has been harder than ever in my life, and summer has been incredibly stressful. It helps to be able to see that in the midst of that, I've still been gaining some ground on me.