The Medical Side

I haven't written as much about my 'condition' as I'd hoped to. (Sounds a bit dramatic when described that way don't you think?). But my goal when being translucent (isn't that a step away from transparent?) was to possibly help someone else who may find themselves in my shoes. Or maybe someone will know someone in my shoes and will remember reading some of my Debbie-downer posts and attempt to take a positive spin on them. Either way, I wanted to write today about the scientific side of what I'm going through.

So, I'll start 10 years ago. In 2003 I was a broke college student who read an ad in the school newspaper for a clinical research study for a new acne medicine. Not only did it potentially offer a solution to my long-endured acne trouble, but it also paid $500. All I had to do was have a blood test, take some pills for 3 months and report back.

But, my gravy train ran dry when my initial blood test showed an alarmingly high TSH level in my blood. TSH = thyroid stimulating hormone, and if the level is high it means your hormones are over producing in an effort to stimulate your thyroid, which means your thyroid is under-functioning. Diagnosis: hypothyroidism. Suddenly my severe and sudden weight gain, increased anxiety levels, trouble keeping my body cool (among other symptoms) all made sense.  And once I told people, I learned it is incredibly common for females on both sides of my family, which means I was practically doomed. I began taking synthroid daily, which I'll take the rest of my life, and spent almost 2 years closely monitoring progress to regulate the dosage. In roughly 2005 we settled on a dose and it wasn't increased again until I was pregnant with William. that dose lasted until a few weeks ago.

However, in the time of regulated medicine I went back to the doctor on numerous occasions complaining of my thyroid symptoms. I was gaining weight despite concentrated efforts to lose. My nails were brittle. My hair was falling out rapidly. I was always very hot or very cold, never comfortable. And yet, each time I went I heard back in a few days letting me know my levels were fine.

It was infuriating! I knew these things weren't right and yet my blood results indicated I was fine. I wasn't fine. Last December when my doctor said it was fine I insisted she take more blood and test more indicators (T4, T3, and another that slipped my mind) because I had read in a book sometimes TSH can be fine while these other thyroid hormones are not. So she did, and she found they were just as peachy as the TSH.

I threw my hands in the air in frustration and then quickly found myself in the thick of tax season. Impossible to focus on tiny health issues between January and April, I vowed to revisit the issue after April 15.

So, in April I was referred to my fertility doctor (who I adore) and before doing any testing he went over medical history with me. We discussed my thyroid and other health history and then he went into detail explaining what he anticipated would be the findings of the day: PCOS. He explained what an ovary looks like in a person with PCOS, he explained symptoms related to PCOS and went over treatments. A few minutes later when he did an ultrasound my ovary appeared on the screen and it looked identical to the picture he drew in his office. I was amazed.

I was more amazed, though, to find out that the symptoms I had always associated with my thyroid were also possible symptoms of PCOS. He speculated that I had PCOS that whole time and that it likely developed around the time my hypothyroidism developed. But, because my doctors and I were always so focused on my thyroid nobody seemed to notice the rebel ovaries down there. The majority of my complaints arose in times when I was not on birth control, and birth control is a way of regulating PCOS so it is theorized that when not on birth control my PCOS ramped up, causing my symptoms to flare while my thyroid remained constant.

While it was frustrating to know that my doctor may have been able to find the root of not only my weight gain but also my infertility last December, it was also so freeing to finally have an explanation and understanding of it all. Knowing is half the battle, and it felt so good to finally know.

I think I've mentioned that this only reinforces how much of a miracle William is. I already knew, but this just reminded me that God had a perfect plan for William. He knew the issues inside my body and he knew when he wanted William born. He orchestrated all of the events for the miracle of life to transpire, and it couldn't be more apparent to me. This also offers reassurance that God has his hand in all of this now as well, and His plan is pure and perfect and we will all stand in awe of his power grace in the end.