I Cried Like a Baby

Last Thanksgiving when Alexis called me, I knew what she'd have to say: Jake had proposed and they'd be getting married! I was full of mixed emotions - I was nothing less than ecstatic for them and I know that they complement each other so well, but I was also a little bitter - I had been living in Houston for 10 months and had JUST moved back to Denver, and THEN Jake decided to propose? Thanks a lot. Imagine the fun Alexis and I could have had if he'd proposed back in January and we had the entire year to plan and go wedding-crazy! Could have been fun. Nevertheless, I was thrilled beyond belief and was so excited to be asked to be Alexis's Matron of Honor.

Leading up to the wedding Alexis had the right mindset on the importance of the wedding day. The minor details that no one notices, the misc questions that people think are pertinent but will quickly be forgotten - none of those things are what matters. The wedding day is just that - a day. It will be the best day of your life not because of the colors or flowers or your dress; it will be the best day of your life because it starts the rest of your life. The symbol of the day is what is most important, not the day itself. So many brides get so wrapped up in the DAY that once its over, there is such a let down. It shouldn't be a let down - you should be more excited the day after your wedding for what you have embarked upon, and that is how your marriage should be approached. That is coming from me, the marriage expert of course. I was very proud that Alexis, not one to be too detail oriented to begin with, didn't get too wrapped up in the wedding day forgetting where the value truly is. I know some people may criticize this, but that's the other beautiful part about your wedding...it is YOUR wedding. If someone thinks your dress is ugly, your flowers are plain, your bridesmaids aren't supportive, or whatever other opinions people will muster up it doesn't matter. It is your wedding, and should be exactly how you want it. For that day, no one else matters but you, your spouse-to-be, and your family. (though maybe you can just care about YOUR opinions and forget the others...) But the end result, when a bride takes the view that the day is hers and the value sits in the marriage, is a beautiful, personal wedding with a couple that is focused on what really matters.

Alexis's day was exactly that.

I'll take a second to navigate away from my thoughts and tell you that Austin continuously called it "Jake's' wedding" One time I asked him why - he knew Alexis first, and I think I generally associate a wedding with whichever person I knew first or knew better, but not Austin. He said "Well, everyone forgets about the groom. But our wedding was just as important to me as it was to you, so I know Jake will feel the same way" Kudos Austin. He'd really appreciate my broadcasting his softer side here, I am sure.

I was disappointed to have to miss out on some of the festivities of Alexis's wedding, but I was SO excited to see her at the church Friday night for the rehearsal. The rehearsal went as most do - we walked, we talked, we learned how to enter and exit doorways - a very educational experience. The rehearsal dinner was at a nearby Italian restaurant where Alexis and I decided we should see who could eat more bread & oil. I don't know who won, I just know my final count...and I'll keep that a secret. It was delicious! When time came for the toasts I poured my champagne in Austin's glass, since I couldn't drink any, so the waiter quickly refilled it. This happened twice before I decided I should just leave a small amount in my glass so he'd stop thinking I was the lush of the party. It smelled good though! After dinner Alexis, Lisa (Jake's brother's fiance) and I went back to Jake's house to sleep. I had it in my head it'd be fun to stay up watching movies, painting nails, doing girly things - but we were all exhausted so I wasn't disappointed when they wanted to go to sleep instead :)

Saturday was a FULL day. At Alexis's shower she had mentioned she wasn't sure what she'd do with her time, since the wedding wasn't until 7, but we barely had a minute to spare. Lisa and I ran errands in the morning while Alexis took care of some business for work, then we had our nails done, had lunch at panera, all got showered and headed to the church. We thought we'd be so ahead of schedule until Lisa and I realized we both had lion's manes on top of our heads and it was 4:00 - photographer to arrive at 4:45. YIKES. We quickly did our hair (which was a wasted effort once we stepped outside into 100% humidity), did our makeup, got our dresses on, and got alexis's beautiful gown on her.

After we did some girl photos and Nicole (our high school classmate who is a very talented photographer) took some boy photos, Alexis and Jacob had decided to do a "first look" They had agreed they'd be too emotional if the first time they saw each other was at the altar, so they arranged to see each other about an hour before hand. Alexis never looked more beautiful. It wasn't the dress or the hair, or her fancy shoes which I loathe - but the smile on her face. In the 11 years I've been friends with her, I've never seen her more happy, more at ease, or more confident.

And I think that is why I cried like a baby. I think throughout the day we were too busy for me to even sit back and think about what was happening. I spent 2 hours with Alexis in her dress and never had a moment of shock, awe, tears, or any emotion other than excitement. But when she turned the corner to walk down the aisle I lost it. I'd like to blame it on the pregnancy hormones, but I think we all know that's a lie. I could see Jacob's smile from the corner of my eye, I could see her face and I was just so, so SO excited for the both of them. Marriage has been one of the greatest lessons of my life so far - teaching about commitment, compromise, love, forgiveness, and many many more virtues - but it has also been one of the greatest blessings of my life, and I know that Jacob and Alexis will approach theirs with the same attitude that we have approached ours. So I couldn't have been more thrilled to have been a part of their day.

Congrats Jacob & Alexis - almost 2 weeks down, a lifetime to go :)