Growing up I knew my Godmother was Aunt Laura (lolly) and my Godfather was Brett. Mandy and Leon are Brian's Godparents, and "silly old Doug" and his wife are Brandon's. I never knew, really, what it MEANT to have Godparents, how they were chosen, why they were chosen, or what this glorified role in a child's life was to mean. I know that Marty and Jan asked my parents to be Robert's Godparents, so I liked to think of him as my God-brother, and I know Faith was my parent's Goddaughter as well.
Beyond that, I didn't put much thought into Godparents other than the fact that they were the lucky people who got to stand next to the baby during baptism, generally blocking my view. (I loved babies)
I don't think I've ever put an ounce of thought into the concept either, until back in April when my friend Jen told me they had picked a godfather but not a godmother. She talked about how big of a responsibility it was, and that Maddox's godfather wanted his role, in the event of Jen and Jordan's death, to be more financial and less of a parental role in Maddox's life...so their search for a godmother was going to be a more difficult search because they would be looking for a guardian. I hadn't ever thought about the aspect of being a guardian, but I didn't think that my parents would have given guardianship to 3 different families for my brothers and I, and I thought the concept of a godparent was religiously based as they are present at the baptism...but after quickly being perplexed on the topic I dropped it because I didn't assume I would be needing to make that decision anytime soon.
Well, once we found out we were pregnant one of the topics that came up was godparents. We both asked a few people's opinion, looked in the book of common prayer at the celebration of baptism, and we discussed it a bit, and we came to the agreement that, for our kids at least, Godparents would be more related to religious upbringing and guidance and that guardianship would be a different issue. We agreed that to ask someone to be a Godparent would be asking them to commit to help raise our child knowing Jesus and guiding him/her in their religious growth. That is a bigger decision than I would have thought before.
We have TONS of friends, family, etc who will influence William (and any future sibling/s) in his life just by being as involved as they are in our lives. But to ask someone to specifically take on the task of religious guidance - it is a different element of responsibility. I don't know that I am personally in the best place to guide a child in that manner, so who is? We've brainstormed, discussed, revisited, and ignored the issue - I just really never knew it would be such a decision.
That being said, there were plenty of people who helped teach me about Jesus, were role models in how to live a Christian life, and who were there to answer any questions or doubts I may have. I remember when I was about 5 years old(a complete estimation on my part here as I could have been any age really) my mom took me to a Christian concert at Astroworld with some of her friends from church. Jan Scarpati was there, and at one point when I raised my hands in the air while we were singing Jan looked down and asked me why I was doing that. I was embarrassed because I thought I had done something wrong, but then Jan picked me up and explained to me what it meant to raise your hands in worship and she added that wasn't ridiculing me, she was just wondering what I was thinking about as I did it. Turns out I just saw other people, mainly my mom and Jan, doing it so I did it too - but from that point on I knew what it meant to be moved by worship and to raise your hands in praise.
Another very distinct memory is of Judy Newey, and came around mother's day 1994 when my dad was first in the hospital with leukemia. I know it was around mother's day because it was when my brothers and I were living at the Sharpe's house while my mom was finishing her semester of school and spending her evenings/nights at the hospital. Rod and Cathy Sharpe had offered to take care of my brothers and I for about 2 weeks; Cathy drove 5 kids to 4 schools every morning, picked us up every afternoon, made sure all our homework was done, and took us all to the hospital to see my dad. That, in itself, speaks wonders about acting out of love. One afternoon at the hospital Bob and Judy Newey had come to see my dad and Judy had on a gold necklace with a purse pendant. The pendant was pretty big, as far as pendants go, and it opened up like a real purse. Anyone who knows me knows that I have had a fetish for purses since I could walk, so the necklace caught my eye. I told Judy I liked it and Judy responded, "I thought you might like this. Lauren told me that you liked to play purses when she used to babysit you. She said you were so cute, and you always wanted her to bring ALL of her purses over so you could see them" Again, I remember being a little embarrassed, until Judy took the necklace off and put it around my neck. She said "I want you to have this" I told her she didn't have to give it to me, and I could just play with it for awhile, but she replied "Jesus calls us to love children as He does, and he tells us that whatever we do for others we are doing for Him. I know you love purses, and I know you will enjoy this necklace more than I do, so I want you to have it as a special gift from me. Whenever you play with it or wear it, please remember how much Bob and I love you and your family". Not many days at the hospital had bright moments, but that day shined for me. We went back to Rod and Cathy's house and instead of playing basketball outside with the boys, I just sat at the kitchen table all night playing with my new purse.
Neither Jan nor Judy were asked upon my baptism to be my godparents, but they both impacted me in such a large way, by such small actions, that nearly 20 years later I still distinctly remember the lessons they taught me. And if I had more time I could share more stories; Jan and Judy are not at all alone in their lessons. So while I realize that the decision to ask someone to be William's Godparents is not one to take lightly, I also know that as long as Austin and I surround ourselves with people who not only love us and love William, but people who know and love Jesus, he will be touched in ways we could only hope for by many people that we haven't specifically called upon.
Knowing this, however, doesn't make our decision any more simple.
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